Each of us has the challenge of controlling our thoughts, appetites, speech, temper, and desires. No one can escape this challenge. We each face this challenge in our own way – for none of our challenges are exactly the same. It is one of the reasons that we came to earth – to obtain a physical body, and then to master it.
Only we can control our own appetites and passions. No one else can do it for us. Self mastery will not happen on its own. It is something we must work at.
It takes a lifetime of personal commitment and purposeful effort to master ourselves. If we fail to master ourselves, our lives become like an unattended garden, overgrown with uncontrolled weeds, thistles, and briars – rather than growing a beautiful, orderly, well-maintained garden that produces that which is nourishing and sustaining in our pursuit of eternal life.Mosiah 3:19
For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam,and will be,forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit,and
putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ
the Lord…”
Self mastery is the ultimate test of our character. It requires great effort on our part. Some of the weeds in our garden are easy to spot, and eradicate, especially when the weeds have just sprung up, and are easy to pull. Others weeds become large, and are difficult to pull – and we will need to get help in pulling them out. Some weeds may have deep roots, and just seem to keep cropping up over and over again. Yet, there are other weeds that are hard to see and easy to overlook, but if left unattended still cause great damage to our garden, even to its destruction. Mastering ourselves may well be the hardest thing we are called upon to do in this life.
Our Own Bucket of Troubles
Each of us has been blessed with our own set of character traits. We each have our own strengths, and, likewise, we each have our own weaknesses. Speaking of weaknesses, the Lord said:
And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men
weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that
humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have
faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them. (Ether 12:17)
Mortal life was not meant to be without its challenges. The Lord has given us weaknesses, that we may learn from them. Most important of all, that we can learn to be humble. If we are sufficiently humble, we will learn two things: 1) That we need to rely on the Lord to overcome our weaknesses, and 2) That we need to realize each of us is weak, in our own way. We all have need to repent, and overcome. None of us has reason to lift ourselves up in pride, thinking ourselves better than another, we may be strong in one area, where another is weak. However, it is also invariably true that others are strong in areas in which we are weak. (See Matthew 7:1-5)
Some weaknesses are more visible than others. Some may be obvious -- even glaring. While others are more subtle, not easily detected by others. Whether visible or not – each of us has our own set of weaknesses and challenge that we need to overcome. There is no point in comparing ourselves with others. Comparing who has the largest bucket of woes never solved any problems. What really matters is – how am I doing in my own battle to overcome my weaknesses? And, am I doing better today, than I was yesterday? Am I making progress.
As we humbly seek the Lord, he will give us the strength to overcome our weaknesses, even to the extent that what once was a weakness, can eventually become a strength to us, and we in turn, can become a strength to others as well.
Spiritual Gifts
Our strengths, both those we were born with, and those which have been developed as we have overcome weaknesses, can be considered “Spiritual Gifts”.
D&C 46:11-12
11 For all have not every gift given unto them; for there are many gifts, and to every man is given a gift by the Spirit of God.
12 To some is given one, and to some is given another, that all may be profited thereby.
As we obtain these gifts of spiritual strength to overcome our weaknesses, we can, and should help lift one another that they too, may overcome as well.
Me Vs. It
Elder Melvin J Ballard once said:
The greatest conflict that any man or woman will ever have . . . will be the battle that is had with self.
I should like to say to you, my brethren and sisters, that all the assaults that the enemy of our souls will make to capture us will be through the flesh, because it is made up of the unredeemed earth, and he has power over the elements of the earth. The approach he makes to us will be through the lusts, the appetites, the ambitions of the flesh. All the help that comes to us from the Lord to aid us in this struggle will come to us through the spirit that dwells within this mortal body. So these two mighty forces are operating upon us through these two channels.
Elder Ballard Describes this battle as Me Vs. It. He said:
I should like to speak of spirit and body as “me” and “it.” “Me” is the individual who dwells in this body, who lived before I had such a body, and who will live when I step out of the body. “It” is the house I live in, the tabernacle of flesh; and the great conflict is between “me” and “it.” (Melvin J Ballard, “Struggle for the Soul”, New Era, March 1984, 32)
Examine Ourselves
So, how does the battle go for you? Each of us needs to take the time to periodically examine ourselves, and see how our battle to overcome the flesh is going. Each week, as we attend sacrament meeting, we have a pre-established appointment for this very purpose. It is at the time when the sacrament is being administered. During this time of quiet, we look at our own lives, and our own behaviors, and determine whether or not we are in sin and transgression, and have yielded ourselves to the tempter. If this is so, then we need to repent and make peace with those we may have offended. That we may partake of the sacrament worthily, and be cleansed and purified.
Fasting
Once a month, we all have the opportunity to fast. This is a time when we have the opportunity to show the body who is boss! Who will win, the flesh, or the spirit. Seemingly, as soon as we determine that we will fast, our body begins to cry out in protest. It starts to whine and fuss with things like:
“My head will ache, my knees will quake, I shall feel faint; I cannot fast so long; I must eat a little.” Are you yielding? If so, we know who is winning that battle, and who is gaining the mastery.
The Spirit may respond with answers like:
“You can do without these two meals; it will not hurt you. And though my head may ache and my body may feel faint, I will not die; I am bigger than you are, and once a month I will show you that I am master.”
What strength that will give you to resist tomorrow when some other craving arrives! It may be for liquor, tobacco, or some other craving of the flesh.
The Prophet Isaiah also teaches us how the power of fasting can help us break bad habits, and gain control over the flesh.
Isaiah 58: 6-11
6 Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?
Spiritual Nourishment
We know that the body requires proper food and exercise to grow and be healthy and strong.
The same is true of our spirits. We need to have proper spiritual nourishment, and spiritual exercise, In order that our spirits can grow in wisdom and strength, to have power to dominate and master the flesh.
Where can we get spiritual nourishment? It Is found right here, as we partake of the sacrament worthily. It is found in the scriptures as we read, and ponder the teachings of the Lord and his servants. It is found when we pray: in secret, with our companions, and with our families. It is found when we gather our families together for family home evening. We find nourishment to our souls as we attend the temple, and leave the cares and worries of the world behind, and feast upon the spirit as we contemplate the purposes of life, and the possibilities of eternity.
Spiritual nourishment also comes through service. As we serve the Lord in our callings and as we serve one another as friends and neighbors, we also find nourishment to our souls. We find that as we selflessly serve others, that our own wounds are healed by the Lord. Our spirits are strengthened. The lusts of the flesh, and the petty self-centeredness that we often fall prey to are held in check. For the servant is worthy of his hire. And the Lord rewards us with the bread of life, and the cup of living water. Our souls can be filled so that we hunger and thirst no more for the things of the flesh, but we will find our lives filled with the things of purity and righteousness – that which brings a peace which cannot be found in pursuit of the lusts of the flesh, but a peace which surpasseth all understanding.
We will still have our share of trials and heartaches. We still live in the world, but we are not of the world.
The Power of Habits
We have mentioned partaking of the sacrament, fasting, and nourishing our spirits as ways we can gain control over the flesh. These things enable us to have the strength and ability to make changes in our lives – sometimes dramatic changes. Through the Lord’s Atonement and his suffering for our sins, he has opened the way to us in which we can overcome the flesh, and be cleansed of the sins which so easily beset us.
Many of the “thorns in the flesh” as the Apostle Paul described them, come in the form of habits. We are creatures of habit. Habits can be very powerful. Habits can be good or bad.
Ralph Waldo Emerson once said:
“That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do; not that the nature of the thing itself is changed, but that our power to do is increased.”
When we persist in actions, that we repeat over and over again, it becomes easier and easier to do them. We begin to do them without really thinking about it. In the case of bad habits, we can be lulled away onto the slippery slope of sin. If we are not careful, one bad habit can lead to another, that is worse than the first. Over time, we can find ourselves far away from where we planned to be. The prophet Nephi said it this way:
2 Nephi 28:21
And others will he pacify, and lull them away into carnal security, that they will say: All is well in Zion; yea, Zion prospereth, all is well—and thus the devil cheateth their souls, and leadeth them away carefully down to hell.
As we indulge in sin and bad habits, our spirits lose the battle over the flesh, little by little, until the spirit is in bondage to the whims and desires of the body. Our spirits become desensitized, and what previously might have been offensive to us no longer seems so bad. We become further cheapened and coarsened. We find the light within us becoming more and more dim, until ultimately, we find ourselves in darkness, and we are not quite sure how we got there.
If, on the other hand, instead of sliding down the slippery slope of sin, we make affirmative choices to foster good habits in ourselves, we then find ourselves on quite an opposite course. If we determine to pray meaningfully. If we strive to spend time reading and pondering the scriptures. If we make sure that we find ourselves standing in holy places, and doing holy things, we will find that we will not be moved, and that Satan will have no power over us. (See D&C 87:8)
Controlling Our Thoughts
When I was a young man, I had a bad habit that I wanted to overcome. I knew that the Lord wanted me to overcome this habit, but like a perennial weed in the garden, it seemed to keep coming back again and again. Finally the time came when I had to face myself, and decide who was to be in charge” Me or It. I determined that I would use fasting to help give my spirit the power it would need to overcome this challenge.
I fasted with real intent . During that fast, I prayed often, and sought for guidance in the scriptures. At the conclusion of my fast, I felt real power come into my heart and soul. I knew that I could overcome! I also had been inspired with a key to overcome this bad habit. That key was that I needed to learn to control my thoughts.
The truth I learned was, that we rarely will do anything that we have not first thought about. If I could keep control of my thoughts, I could then keep control of my actions. When a thought, or temptation would come to me to go back to my old ways, I would pluck that thought out, and cast the evil thought from my mind.
Not long before this time, I had heard a talk given my Elder Boyd K. Packer. He had taught about a method he had used to control his thoughts. I felt impressed that I too should use this method.
I would like share that method with you, as I quote from Elder Packers Talk:
“The mind is like a stage. Except when we are asleep the curtain is always up. There is always some act being performed on that stage. It may be a comedy, a tragedy, interesting or dull, good or bad; but always there is some act playing on the stage of the mind.
Have you noticed that without any real intent on your part, in the middle of almost any performance, a shady little thought may creep in from the wings and attract your attention? These delinquent thoughts will try to upstage everybody.
If you permit them to go on, all thoughts of any virtue will leave the stage. You will be left, because you consented to it, to the influence of unrighteous thoughts.
If you yield to them, they will enact for you on the stage of your mind anything to the limits of your toleration. They may enact a theme of bitterness, jealousy, or hatred. It may be vulgar, immoral, even depraved.
When they have the stage, if you let them, they will devise the most clever persuasions to hold your attention. They can make it interesting all right, even convince you that it is innocent—for they are but thoughts.
What do you do at a time like that, when the stage of your mind is commandeered by the imps of unclean thinking?—whether they be the gray ones that seem almost clean or the filthy ones which leave no room for doubt.
If you can control your thoughts, you can overcome habits, even degrading personal habits. If you can learn to master them you will have a happy life.
This is what I would teach you. Choose from among the sacred music of the Church a favorite hymn, one with words that are uplifting and music that is reverent, one that makes you feel something akin to inspiration. Remember President Lee’s counsel; perhaps “I Am A Child of God” would do. Go over it in your mind carefully. Memorize it. Even though you have had no musical training, you can think through a hymn.
Now, use this hymn as the place for your thoughts to go. Make it your emergency channel. Whenever you find these shady actors have slipped from the sidelines of your thinking onto the stage of your mind, put on this record, as it were.
As the music begins and as the words form in your thoughts, the unworthy ones will slip shamefully away. It will change the whole mood on the stage of your mind. Because it is uplifting and clean, the baser thoughts will disappear. For while virtue, by choice, will not associate with filth, evil cannot tolerate the presence of light.
In due time you will find yourself, on occasion, humming the music inwardly. As you retrace your thoughts, you discover some influence from the world about you encouraged an unworthy thought to move on stage in your mind, and the music almost automatically began. . .” (Boyd K. Packer, “Inspiring Music—Worthy Thoughts,” Ensign, Jan. 1974, 25)
I used this approach, to keep temptations, and evil thoughts out of my mind. I found that the direction I received from the Spirit, through my fast was true. As I began to master my thoughts, I could master my actions.
I hope I have given you some insights into the personal battle each of us fights each day. I hope and pray that each of us will use the tools the Lord has given us to strengthen ourselves spiritually, that we can overcome the flesh, and be cleansed of our sins.
I know that our Savior lives. I know that he too has fought this battle and won. He has made it possible for us to win also. And as we do, we shall become more like Him.
Talk References:
James E. Faust, “The Power of Self-Mastery,” Ensign, May 2000, 43
Boyd K. Packer, “Inspiring Music—Worthy Thoughts,” Ensign, Jan. 1974, 25
Melvin J. Ballard, “Struggle for the Soul,” New Era, March 1984, 32
Also see: David O. McKay Manual - Chapter 2 "The Dual Nature of Man".
